Judd Apatow, the director and producer of Knocked Up and Bridesmaids, was interviewed in the latest issue of Elle. In it, he discussed how he first met his wife of 15 years, Leslie Mann. She auditioned for The Cable Guy in 1996 which Judd co-wrote and produced. After meeting her, Judd said, "There goes the future Mrs. Apatow. I was in love. I had a soul connection instantly. I meant it. That's why I remember it."
Leslie, though, wasn't feeling it. She was concerned about auditioning. Even funnier, she had a crush on Ben Stiller who directed the film. Keeping an open mind, Leslie agreed to have dinner with Judd before a basketball game. She said on the way to the game she realized that whereas her last boyfriend was mean, Judd was nice. He was the type of person with whom she should be.
The first point I want to make is that a man knows right off the bat whether he must have a woman. She can turn herself inside out and if the man isn't interested, nothing she does will change this. However, when he wants her, he knows it from the start. This is especially applicable to a woman who stays in a dead-end relationship with a man hoping he'll change his mind about marrying her.
Now, a man will still want to date you even if he's sure you're "The One." Obviously, this is so he can be sure you are what you seem. This is fine. But, even while dating, he still knows.
Second, I've noted before that a woman need not always act interested in a man nor must she reassure him of her interest. I won't belabor that point here. But, notice how even though Leslie really wanted Ben, she still went out with Judd. She didn't have all of her eggs in one basket and played the field. Being open-minded when dating can lead you to your next long-term relationship and/or future husband.
Lastly, what I also deduced is that Leslie was more focused on auditioning and landing her next acting role than on picking up men. When a man sees that a woman isn't desperate, it makes her even that much more alluring. In totality, you don't need to work for a man's attention. Rest assured, he who wants you will find you.
Until next time...
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