Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds Wed -- How Did She Land Him?

Credit: PRPhotos.com

Gasp! Could I have been…wrong?

Splashed across the headlines this morning is the news that Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds wed in a secret ceremony on Sunday night just outside Charleston, South Carolina. I’m not going to cover the details of the wedding because those are everywhere. What’s of interest to me is how did Blake, who seemingly didn’t play hard-to-get, land Ryan?

From the outset of their relationship, I’ve yammered at Blake about not being mysterious enough. In my first post about them, I said she spent too much time with Ryan. Then they bought a house together and I said Blake could’ve played all of this so much better. Though I acknowledged Ryan might propose, I thought he'd take his sweet time. Just last week, I posted about how Ryan said he wasn’t going to marry Blake and that she should leave.

And then she goes and gets married – right under our noses! That..little…MINX! Just kidding -- this is great news and I’m super happy for them! I’m sure Blake is orbiting with excitement.

Readers of my blog know that I say “tsk tsk” when a woman isn’t playing hard-to-get. I  warn her that she could lose a man if she doesn’t dial back the “I’m so crazy about him” behavior known for driving a man away. As with everything, though, there are exceptions.

So, is Blake an exception?

Credit: PRPhotos.com

Based on what the tabloids have reported and what I've seen, yes. With that said, I wonder if she was already engaged when they purchased a home. I remember something about their visit to an antique jewelry shop. It sounds like Ryan proposed and immediately set a wedding date which is all good stuff!

For the sake of argument, let’s say that Blake went against every hard-to-get principle out there and still got married. What it really comes down to is whether this impacts you. In other words, would the fact that Blake didn’t play hard-to-get make you not want to?

When I first started playing hard-to-get, I remember looking around at every woman out there who didn’t and thinking “I don’t have to do this because it works even if you don’t.” So, I would fall off the wagon and always end up hurt.

I no longer care who is engaged or married without being hard-to-get because I do what works for me. They teach you in 12-Step that comparing is despairing. I can’t measure my life against others, especially when it comes to men.

If pursuing men and not being mysterious works for you, then go with it! If you achieve the desired results and men treat you great, then there might be nothing for me to teach you. You have no incentive to acknowledge my advice.

Credit: PRPhotos.com

For the rest of us (myself included) if I so much as pick up the phone past 10:00 pm and take a man’s call, the whole thing blows up on me. I have no idea why it is. It just is. Because I know there are breakdowns when I don’t play hard-to-get, I stick with the program because I’m sure it works.

Blake’s way is a roll of the dice in my world. I do my best to never make mistakes because I can’t stand the guilt of not going about my relationships right the first time. Scads of “Blake and Ryan’s” could marry under my nose and you still couldn't convince me to approach a cute man first or live with him before we married.

I don’t have any secret answer as to how she did it. I'm happy for her, but also a bit nervous. Will Ryan spend more time at the golf course than with her? Will he always want to have sex with her or will that fall off in a year? I swear every woman pays when she doesn’t, sooner or later, it blows up.

Heidi Klum supposedly talked to Seal first and made it known she liked him. Sure, they married. But, then he started screaming at her and now accuses her of sleeping with the bodyguard while they were married. Katy Perry let John Mayer know she’s crazy about him and they were just spotted at Vegas strip club last night. He’s not exactly wanting to wine and dine her like a future wife.

For so many women, it doesn’t work when a man knows too quickly you like him. Pay now. Pay later. It’s up to you.

Tell me what you think! Should you bother playing hard-to-get based on what you saw happen with Blake and Ryan?

Until next time…

Shine like Platinum!
Vanessa

Credit: PRPhotos.com

Text. Love. Power.: The Ultimate Girls Relationship Guide to Texting and Dating in the New Millennium 

Amazon top #3 in Kindle eBooks for "Happiness"

No Kindle or iPad? Read Text. Love. Power. on your computer. Simply download Kindle for PC and have your texting questions answered immediately for $3.99!

Click here to see my video on why famous actress Olivia Wilde needs Text. Love. Power..

Top Stories