Monday, August 27, 2012

Kellan Lutz Says He’s Not Fake with Girlfriend Sharni Vinson – How Little White Lies Can Spell Disaster

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You’re on a date with Mr. Handsome who's a huge football fan. Better yet, like David Puddy from Seinfeld, he’s a face painter. You cringe on the inside because you can’t stand football. He then asks you, “do you like football?”

Here's the dilemma. He’s so darn cute and you want to like everything he does so he can be oh-so-wowed by all of your mutual similarities. So you tell a teeny, tiny, insy, bitsy, white lie and say you love football. When he asks your favorite teams, you offer a couple you’ve overheard your friends discuss. You add, “I don’t follow but like watching it.” He starts asking you to football games that you really don’t want to go. Now what?

Twilight star Kellan Lutz had the same predicament. He admitted telling an ex-girlfriend that he liked a certain band only because she did. Then she bought tickets to see them and he said he felt stuck into going. Kellan confessed it wasn’t fair to either of them. Nowadays, he won't fake who he is in order for a girl to like him back.

His strategy worked really well because he’s now in a great relationship with Sharni Vinson. And wow does he sound crazy about her! He said they connect on every level, laugh a lot together, and that their relationship is so easy because it’s honest. Hmmm…I wonder if there will be wedding bells someday for these two. Whenever a man talks like this about a woman, he’s usually in it for the long haul.

I liked what Kellan said for a couple of reasons. The first is because you don’t have to fake who you to make a person like you. Not sharing the exact same interests as a man isn’t necessarily a deal-breaker. If it is, then better to say so upfront and let him find another person more suitable and likewise for you. Better to speak honestly now than tell a white lie and face disaster later.

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You can also say something positive such as, “Football isn’t my sport because I really prefer soccer/baseball/basketball.” Or, “Im not really interested in this band because I enjoy another group more.” You want to balance not sounding disinterested or negative while at the same time not pigeonholing yourself into admitting liking things you don’t.

Another point to mention is that even if you don’t like football, you can still say, “I heard the Patriots are headed to the Superbowl this year.” Most people generally know about big sporting events so it’s fine to show at least you keep up with the headlines. You can draw the line at spouting quarterback completion percentages, though.

The second reason Kellan’s words are insightful is because you don’t want to lie about certain interests and risk a man finding out you're just that desperate to have him like you. He’ll find it a turn-off that you have no backbone and maybe take advantage of it down the road. Plenty of men will respect a woman for being who she is and not concerning herself about whether she’s good enough for him.

Finally, I believe in what Kellan said about how “easy” it is when it’s right. Have you ever had a relationship with a man where you felt it was headache dealing with him on the smallest things? See, it isn’t necessary to tear your hair out. Relationships can be work, but should never be forced.

Tell me what you think! Have you ever told a little white lie hoping a man would like you more? How did it turn out?

Until next time…

Shine like Platinum!
Vanessa


Credit: PRPhotos.com
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