Sunday, March 25, 2012

Tamron Hall Quietly Dating Lawrence O'Donnell -- How to Make an Office Romance Work!

No one wants to do it. Everyone tries to resist. But, sometimes it happens. The office crush. Your friends tell you it's an awful idea. As do the professional advice articles you're reading on Yahoo! while at work.

His IM just popped up on your monitor. Like it or not, your heart somersaulted. Pushing everyone's practical advice aside, you think about married couples you know who met at work. You're convinced it's possible and that something good can come of this. 

And you'd be right. I'm not endorsing office romances, but they are a fact of of life. This is why I thought I'd give some advice on something people do anyway. If you want it to go anywhere, here's how to make it happen while keeping your professional reputation intact. 

First and foremost, be certain -- very certain -- your company doesn't have policies against fraternization. If it is not anywhere in your contract, it'll most likely be in an Employee Handbook. You don't want to find yourself accused of unethical behavior. If there aren't any, then you can proceed without being worried about violating any company rules.

Let's use MSNBC personalities Tamron Hall and Lawrence O'Donnell as an example. In the beginning of February, the New York Post reported, "they have a romance spicing up off set. The single Last Word host, 60, has been quietly dating the pretty midday anchor and rising star at the network for months. 

The duo have kept their relationship low-profile in the studio but have been spotted canoodling at downtown haunts. Lawrence, a West Wing producer who has a daughter with ex-wife Kathryn Harrold was linked to actress Kerry Washington in 2008."

Tamron is being very Rules about her office romance. Even the New York Post said they're "quietly dating" and kept their relationship "low-profile" in the studio. They aren't openly flirting with each other. It doesn't sound as if their co-workers are whispering around the water cooler. I think the only way people discovered the romance at all is because they were seen outside of the office together.

On that note, this is how a woman knows a man wants to date her. Ellen and Sherrie point out that women frequently find themselves in "fantasy relationships" with men at the office, i.e. pining for men who never ask them out. A man's IMs and overtures are meaningless if they aren't about plans or moving forward. The Rules discerns between a man at the office who must have have a woman versus one who passes the day casually chatting with the pretty girl.

If you're one of these women, you might be tempted to make it easy for him. Don't. There will be opportunities to get to know him at office happy hours or other events. Do your best to not go. If you do, don't spend the whole time talking to him or stay too long. You might think my advice is bad because you'll want to build relationships with your co-workers. But, while you're putting on your lip gloss to go, ask yourself why you're going. Chances are, it's not to bond with your other colleagues.

See, you don't want him to think of you as "the hang out girl." If he wants to see you, he can't coast on an office get-together. He must step-up to the plate and ask you out (lunch once is fine, but a Saturday night date better come shortly thereafter). If you ignore this advice, you'll find that 9 out of 10 times you'll go to one of these events and endless lunches all without being asked for plans outside of the office.

In the case of Tamron and Lawrence, she's got it down. She stays off the radar and makes sure that Lawrence is taking her out. She's not wasting time or jeopardizing her career on a man not sincerely interested in her. Tamron is most certainly making the best out of a less than ideal situation.

I want to thank my reader V.N. Francis for this post idea!


Until next time...

Shine like Platinum!
Vanessa

 

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